HAIKU, Maui, July 31, 2011 - It all started last night, when a flood emotions from my Constantine lifetime was triggered by an email from a woman-friend with whom I felt I had a connection as the Roman Emperor.  This led me to do some reading about that period.   I was stunned by a strong emotional reaction to and familiarity with the Constantine Arch in Rome in one of the articles (right).  I immediately recognized it as something Elizabeth and I also saw during our visit to Rome in 2009 (left).  The triumphal Arch is situated between the Colosseum and the Palatine Hill.  Elizabeth even took a picture of me looking at it from the direction the emperor would have entered the plaza before riding under the Arch (left). But until last night, I had no idea about its significance in my life as Constantine, nor in the history of Christianity. 

The Arch was erected to commemorate Constantine's victory over Maxentius at the Battle of Milvian Bridge on October 28, 312.  The large inscription at the top reads:

IMP · CAES · FL · CONSTANTINO · MAXIMO · P · F · AVGUSTO · S · P · Q · R · QVOD · INSTINCTV · DIVINITATIS · MENTIS · MAGNITVDINE · CVM · EXERCITV · SVO · TAM · DE · TYRANNO · QVAM · DE · OMNI · EIVS · FACTIONE · VNO · TEMPORE · IVSTIS · REM-PVBLICAM · VLTVS · EST · ARMIS · ARCVM · TRIVMPHIS · INSIGNEM · DICAVIT

To the Emperor Caesar Flavius Constantinus, the greatest, pious, and blessed Augustus: because he, inspired by the divine, and by the greatness of his mind, has delivered the state from the tyrant and all of his followers at the same time, with his army and just force of arms, the Senate and People of Rome have dedicated this arch, decorated with triumphs.

Which made me do some research about the Battle of Milvian Bridge.  When I saw Raphael's painting of that battle (right), my heart practically stopped.  It certainly jumped.  I was surprised by strong emotions it evoked in me.  Not the battle scene.  The painting depicted a time before the battle.   I, as Constantine, had a vision of the cross in a cloud in the sky.  I also saw Greek letters X and P, which early Christians used as the sign for Christ (ΧPιστός).  The article said Constantine felt it was God's message saying, "in this sign you will conquer."    Which evoked an outburst of emotions in me.  I told my soldiers that if we fought under the sign of the cross on our shields and in our hearts, we would win against all odds.  (Constantine commanded 40,000 troops going into battle again 100,000 which Maxentius was leading). 

As I considered these odds, looking at the painting, I, Bob Djurdjevic - ALTZAR - wept tonight, July 30, 2011, here in Hawaii, at the sight of that cross in the sky.  It filled my heart with God's sacred energy, a sensation with which I am quite familiar by now as a shaman.  And I became a warrior, feeling invincible, ready to take on anybody anywhere.  Even now, as I am writing this, I feel tears streaming down my cheeks.

Milvian Bridge, Rome

Historians are said to have been divided on whether it was that vision at Milvian Bridge that became a turning point for Constantine and for Christianity. I have no doubt now that it was.  The heart does not lie.  And my heart told me that tonight and this morning again.  

(Battle of the Milvian Bridge by Guilio Romano, 1520)

It was that victory at the Milvian Bridge that made me the sole emperor of the Roman empire.  It was that victory, that made me a believer in Christ.  Before that battle, Christians were persecuted throughout the Roman Empire.  It was that victory that led me to issue the Edict of Milan in 313 AD, legalizing Christian worship.  

From then on, I also supported the Church financially, had an large number of basilicas built (including the original St. Peter's in Rome), granted privileges (e.g. exemption from certain taxes) to clergy, promoted Christians to high-ranking offices, returned property confiscated during the Great Persecution of Diocletian, and endowed the church with land and other wealth (see Constantine and Christianity).

Between 324 and 330, Constantine built, virtually from scratch, a new imperial capital at Byzantium on the Bosphorus.  The city was named Constantinople. Unlike the "old" Rome, the "New Rome" was a city which used overtly Christian architecture.  It contained the new Church of the Holy Apostles on the site of a temple to Aphrodite.  Which I now find ironic.  For, Aphrodite is one of my spirit guides.   Sorry, darling.

In 325, I, as Constantine, convened The First Council of Nicaea (left) in Bithynia (present-day Iznik in Turkey).  The Council was attended by 1,800 Christian bishops... 1,000 from the Eastern and 800 from the Western part of the Roman Empire. It was the first effort to attain consensus and codify Christianity through an assembly.  Its main accomplishments were settlement of the issue of the relationship of Jesus' divinity; construction of the first part of the Nicene Creed; settling the calculation of the date of Easter; and promulgation of early canon law.  All are still in effect today, nearly 1700 years later.

Constantine also enforced the prohibition of the First Council of Nicaea against celebrating the Lord's Supper on the day before the Jewish Passover.  But he also made new laws regarding the Jews. They were forbidden to own Christian slaves or to circumcise their slaves.  So I was apparently an abolitionist, at least for Christians, before that term was invented 1500 years later, when the British parliament ended slavery.

All these acts of demonstrating devotion to Christian faith followed and flowed from my vision of the cross before the Battle of Milvian Bridge.  They feel to me now as natural as anything I have ever done in my current lifetime.  They were actions taken by a man who has been converted to Christianity by the spirit (cross), not by man or by the sword.  It is exactly what I, Bob Djurdjevic - ALTZAR - would do today all over again if history were to repeat itself.

Except for one thing.  Today, I would also remember how I became a Christian.  As "Constantine the Great," I forgot that lesson.

Despite all wonderful things Constantine had done for Christianity, which later earned me beatification as Saint Constantine, I was NOT a good Christian in that lifetime.  I did not give up my pagan ways.  I won the imperial throne by the sword.  I expanded and ruled the empire by the sword.  I did not "get it"... that God rules by Love not Fear.

So in my zeal to please God with what I thought were philanthropic acts of service, I became the first Christian to rule by the sword.  (Here... tears are again starting to flow at this moment of confession).

I was as heavy-handed in supporting the Christians as my predecessor-emperors were in persecuting them.  I passed new laws requiring those who had not converted to Christianity "to foot the bill" of all my ambitious projects.  I forced the good Roman citizens and my loyal subjects "to give up their rites (...) and to accustom them to despise their temples and the images contained therein."  

This led to closures of pagan temples due to a lack of financial support. Their wealth flowed to the imperial treasure.  I did not need to use force to implement this.  My subjects obeyed me out of fear.  I ruled the biggest empire man had known in recorded history (left) with an iron fist.  I used fear and intimidation to get what I wanted.  

I was wrong to do it.  Today, for example, as shaman, I would have been considered one of the "pagans," and persecuted accordingly.  I would have been a victim of my own high-mindedness and use of earthly power and God's name in vain.

New Constantine Creed

As I offer today my apologies and amends to the victims of my ambition as Constantine and my rule of the sword, I might as well start with one to myself:

"To you, Bob Djurdjevic - ALTZAR - an Inca-trained and thrice-ordained shaman by the mountain spirits themselves, I bow and apologize for having strayed from your soul intentions.  I should have known better.  Man's power comes from God not man."

"And to you, the multitudes of others whom I abused, injured or killed mistakenly as the Roman Emperor, I also bow and ask forgiveness.  I did not deserve the epithet Constantine The Great.' I acted stupidly.  I thought that such acts would be pleasing to God and Jesus Christ."

Today, I know better.  So I reserve my last apology to the one whom I betrayed the most... the one who has shared himself with me. 

"Dear Creator, Jeshua-Yeshua-Jesus of Nazarene, and all of my other wonderful spirit guides and teachers, I am sorry I failed you as the Roman Emperor Constantine.  You gave me the power to change the world for the better.  I used it for self-glorifying purposes."

(I have had to take a break from typing at this point.  I am sobbing and crying loudly and need time to calm down and blow my nose.  Continuing...)

"I now know why I needed to suffer karmic losses in this lifetime.  I was paying old debts.  Thank you for giving me a chance to try to do better in this lifetime by serving as a shaman and helping uplift other souls as an artist. I have been a poor student, a slow learner. Seventeen centuries is a long time for a human.  But I "get you" now, Father. Thank you for not giving up on me."

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Epilogue

PS: On this day, Sunday, July 31, 2011 - exactly 620,457 days - or 1698 years, 9 months, 3 days from the day I became a Christian in Rome by the sign of the spirit at the Milvian Bridge - I also performed a shamanic ceremony to send by my breath through fire the New Constantine Creed messages to the Creator and to my spirit guides.  For those of you who are interested in ceremonial matters, here's what happened...

• As I usually do for indoor ceremonies, I prepared an offering of Frankincense, Myrrh and Palo Santo (from Peru) at my shaman's altar.  I lit the fire to start the smoke transmission.

• As I inhaled the beautiful cleansing aroma, I than called the Creator's and the spirits' attention by ringing the two Tibetan bowls which transmit the sounds of my soul rays - the F-note for the 3rd ray, and the D-note for the 7th.  I rang each of them three times individually, and three times together in a harmonic convergence (see the video at the end of this story).

• Then I identified myself to the spirits, holding the shaman's Mesa to my heart.  Mesa is a shaman's "celestial PDA."  It consists of the kullas (stones) which were given to the shaman by the mountain sprits at ordination, and have been reinitiated and recharged periodically by crystals, water, fire and sunlight - most importantly, by the shaman's breath and heart:

I am Altzar, the Rainbow Giver

    from the Dogon star

I am a child of the Universe

I am a ray of the original Sun

I am the forest and the land

I am the ocean and the sand

I am Pele's lava and her hearth

I am the wind and the breath

I am the Shepherd of the Earth

I am Wholeness

I am Love

... and I love you.

• After that, I explained why this is a special ceremony and proceeded to conduct it.  Again, tears flowed liberally.

• At one point, I blew the holy water (FL water) spray over the fireplace and the holy smoke, uniting all four elements.

• At the end, I read the New Constantine Creed as outlined above, and transmitted it to the spirit world by fire in the F-Note bowl (right shot) to the sound of my primary soul ray - the 3rd.

And now, here are the sounds of the soul rays 3, 7 and 5.  I recorded them yesterday for a different purpose, not realizing at the time how meaningful they will become in today's ceremony: